Is there a room in your house you avoid, every day? Does the thought of company make your stomach hurt? Are you purposely trying to steer clear of this room by closing a door, using another entrance, looking straight ahead when you walk by? Are you trying not to pay attention to this room’s merciless taunts? You could be the target of room bullying.
My nephew was a target. I was visiting my sister and her family.
She said, “His stomach hurts, he isn’t going to school today.” I looked at him and thought he looked pretty healthy. I wondered what really was going on. When his mother left the room I asked him, “who is being mean to you at school?” After all, I am the older sister with plenty of experience in stomach aches and school.
He immediately said, “James”.
“Oh, and what is James doing to make your stomach hurt?”
My nephew replied, “He said my back pack looks like a baby’s backpack”.
I reported the intel to his mom. She immediately took all of the appropriate steps that mom’s take when their children are under attack. I am happy to report, my nephew is well, James is good and all is right with the elementary school world.
So, what are you doing about the room that is assaulting you on a daily basis? The first step in being a target is to avoid the bully, if possible. If you are the target for room abuse you probably have this step down.
The only way to stop these ferocious attacks on your senses is to stand up to the bully. In this case, stand up to the room. One of the characteristics of a bully is a sense of entitlement and superiority over others. In other words, these bully rooms lack compassion, impulse control and social skills, but you probably already know that. Take the room back. Hold this room accountable. You paid a lot of money to have this space. Think of what it meant to you when you first saw it. Have your dreams of a beautiful space become a memory. Even worse are you living a nightmare?
Take control, make your space accountable to you. This is the only way to stop the bully room. Don’t show you are hurt by this bully room’s daily violation to your senses. Get some support. Have you addressed all seven layers of design in your room? Have the final two layers of the room been ignored?
Have you accessorized this room? Have you put a rug on the floor that ties the room together? A rug that brings out color and pattern in the room. A rug that connects all of the pieces and creates a softer, gentler feel in the space. Have you added pillows that make the room zing? Not those small postage stamp pillows that feel like cardboard covered with an irritating fabric that brings no energy to the room, but nice large fluffy pillows. Pillows that say come and flop on me. Have you added collections of the things you love to the table tops? Are there cozy throws on the sofa and chairs? These are the things that make the room your sanctuary. Rooms need more than sofas, chairs, and tables, they need you.